PAIN

Pain. We all go through it. All of us have experienced pain, whether it be physical, emotional, or even mental. 

But is pain good? Well, it depends. Depends on how you view pain. When it comes to pain, there are three types of people. 

• People who are comfortable with pain
• People who victimize their pain
• People who view pain as valuable

Today, we are going to discuss all three. 

Being comfortable with the pain. Does that mean that you enjoy pain? Not necessarily. Let me explain. For example, a couple of weeks ago, I spilled boiling water on my foot. I put some cold water on it and thought it would be all better by the next day. But, the next day it wasn’t better. I was in a lot of pain and I was limping. Now, a few people that I had told about my incident told me to go see my doctor. But, in my mind, I was thinking that the pain would eventually just go away in a couple of days. Again, that wasn’t the case. I couldn’t move my toes and I was still limping. At this point, my husband intervened and got me to call my doctor and I did. Thankfully, there was no infection but I still needed to get antibiotics for the injury. 

This is a great example of being comfortable with pain. Again, it doesn’t mean that you enjoy pain. To put it in simple terms, we all know someone who always has some kind of misery or drama going on in their life. And this misery or drama is causing them emotional, maybe even mental pain. But, instead of them to investigate or look into why they are experiencing this pain, or what the pain is actually telling them, they shrug it off. They ignore all signs, and just keep right on going. In my example, I kept shrugging of the pain and not getting the help I needed until it was almost too late. People who are comfortable with their pain, they tend to shrug it off until the very last minute or when it’s already too late. Why? Because they’re comfortable. Why are they comfortable? Because that’s what they’re used to and that’s what they know. 

Alright, so let’s talk about those who victimize their pain. 

People who victimize their pain are also comfortable with their pain in a sense that instead of trying to identify what the pain is telling them, they keep right on going. The only difference is that instead of shrugging it off, they complain. Now, there is nothing wrong with talking about your pain. It becomes an issue though, when you don’t follow through with next steps. What are these ‘next steps’? Well, when you experience pain, the next step would be to identify what the pain is telling you. And then after identifying that, the next step would be to figure out a solution. People who victimize their pain, instead of moving on to the next step prefer to stay in that state and complain about it. They believe that they’re alone, lack support and they often feel hopeless. Which most often isn’t the case. But, because they want everyone to feel sorry for them they victimize themselves and their situation. 

Let’s use the example from before. If I had, again not shrugging off my pain, complained and complained and complained about my pain without seeking any help, I would be victimizing my situation. And it’s not like I didn’t receive help. People were advising me to go to the doctor. If I decided to victimize my situation, despite what people were advising to do, I wouldn’t bother to get the help I needed. Why? Because the advice isn’t what I want to hear. I would want people to feel sorry for me. 

So how can pain be valuable? 

People who view pain as valuable learn from their pain. So instead of constantly complaining or  shrugging off their pain, they listen and learn from their pain. How does one listen to their pain? Well, they listen to their pain by not only investigating what the pain tells them but also leaning from it. 

Again, let’s use the same example. I burnt my foot with boiling water. What does that tell me? That tells me that if you accidentally pour boiling water on your foot it’s going to hurt and it could possibly get infected. Easy! But, if we’re really listening to our pain, what does that situation tell me? What did I learn? I learnt that next time when I need help, I should just ask for it, instead of trying to do it and end up hurting myself. And this can be applied to life in general. Instead of doing things on your own, especially when you need the help, ask for assistance. For example, you’ve went through a traumatic experience. Instead of victimizing or shrugging off how the experience has affected your life, go get help. What does the traumatic experience tell you? It tells you that traumatic experiences can take a toll on someone’s life. Great! Now, based off of that, what did you learn? You learned that you’re not invincible and that sometimes you can’t deal with things on your own. And that’s okay! You learned that that’s okay and that getting help is good!

People who view pain as valuable always seek the lessoned learned. And the lesson learned usually can be applied to any situation in their life.

So which one do you choose? Which one are you? Are you comfortable with your pain? Do you victimize your pain? Or do you see pain as valuable? 

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